Whenever I think about posting something, I feel like I have way too much and I don't know where to start so I put it off until later. Sounds like how my school work goes...
So here is a long overdue update on my life. I'm sorry if it sounds repetitive, but my life is pretty stagnant right now. Also... this is really long. Feel free to skim.
First topic: Sterling/Ranger School
Well, I just finished reading my last post which stated how Sterling was rocking Ranger School and he was almost done. Oh, how I should have knocked on wood. No fault of his own, Sterling did not pass the last phase of Ranger School. He had told me before that he would be able to call the Sunday before his graduation date (the 2nd of March) to let me know for sure, and that no news, was good news. Well that Sunday I didn't receive a call from him. You can only imagine my excitement. I had my flight booked, I had hotel/rental car plans with his family. I got it cleared by the dean to miss an exam that week. It was all planned out. It was going to be PERFECT timing too... His graduation date fell on the Friday before my Spring Break. So although I'd miss the exam that was on that Friday, I wouldn't be missing any classes or labs or any other exams.
Then I got the call on Monday morning. I had just gotten done taking a ridiculously hard physiology exam which I worked my butt of studying for, but didn't do too hot on. I was not in a good place. At this point I was so worn down on school that my mini vacation with Sterling was absolutely NEEDED. When he called and told me he didn't pass, I thought he was joking. I even said "You're joking, right?" I can only imagine now, how much more worse that made him feel. After he confirmed it, I instantly started to bawl. I couldn't stop and I was an awful wife for being so unsupportive. I mean, yeah, it sucks for me, but I'm not the one who is going through all this crazy training... not sleeping, barely eating, a ton of physical/mental work... I've felt so awful about my reaction since it happened. Thankfully I have an amazingly strong husband.
The week that followed, I got to talk to Sterling almost every night. Only for about ten minutes each time... but considering that I had only had 2 conversations with him so far this year, ten minutes every day for a week is pretty outstanding. I can't tell you what that alone did for my well being. I had a lazy spring break, but I still felt re-motivated and ready to get through this next month until I get to see him.
With that said, Sterling said he'd either call today or tomorrow to let me know if he has graduated. I haven't bought flight tickets, I haven't worked out with the dean when I'll make up my two exams and lab. I haven't prepared at all... I don't know if I can take another blow like last time. I'm so ready to see Sterling. It's been 3 months. But if he has to go through this phase again, I will support him through it.
My husband is such an amazing man. Not only is he going through this incredibly hard situation, but he has turned it into something great. The first day after he called me he wound up sharing the gospel with one of his friends who also didn't pass the last phase. Mid-way through his week off, he organized and led a mini bible study. He wrote to me in a letter that although it's terrible not getting to see me for another month, if he can save just one person's life by getting this chance to share God's word with him, it's worth it. It makes me love and appreciate him even more than I already did. This may sound hard to believe, but although I have yet to be with my husband in 2012, and I've probably only talked to him for a total of an hour, our relationship has gotten about ten times stronger. I've also learned things about myself that were surprising. This whole experience has made me more positive then ever that I am with the person I am supposed to be with and that we will have a long and wonderful marriage. And that, is very comforting.
Second topic: Medical School
Oh medical school. How I love/hate you.
So in the last few weeks I gave male and female exams. Stuck my fingers in a few interesting places...
I finished one of my classes (physiology) and did pretty well. Started a new class (pathology) and have no idea what's going on in it as I haven't watched barely any of the lectures. I'm in neuroscience right now which I've been rocking (test wise) and I have a lab practical tomorrow which is what I am procrastinating studying... And then there is microbiology.
Freaking microbiology. Let me just say, that I actually really used to like micro. I found it interesting, I was good at it, etc. However, this class has been one of the biggest challenges. The one thing I hate about some of my courses is how they write their freaking exams. Now, I can appreciate that we need to know the different bacteria that cause different infections. I do not, however, need to know every minute detail about said bacteria, nor do I think that we should be examined over that. Oh, but we were and I have been on the struggle bus with that. Major time.
I could go on... but I'll spare you.
Right now, I feel like I am about 2 weeks behind where I should be. Thankfully, everyone feels that way though. The thing that is going to be hard is if I do get to go and visit Sterling this week. I would be leaving on Thursday, missing 3 hours of lecture that day, missing an exam on Friday, missing another 3 hours of lecture on Monday, 4 hours on Tuesday (plus a 2 hour lab), and an exam and 2 hours of lecture on Wednesday. I'll probably come home on Thursday. Then we have a wonderful micro exam that next Monday...
That is going to be hard to work through. But hopefully once I know if I am going or not, I can study like crazy before I leave and not be behind before I leave. We'll see how it goes.
If for some reason Sterling does not graduate however, I'll have to miss my final exams and I'm not so sure I will be able to swing that... So we're really hoping that he graduates!
Other than that... all I do is study. I'm so cool.
Third topic: Running
I have FINALLY gotten back into the running grind. I've figured out that I'm a morning runner. As crazy as it sounds, that's about the only time I can really motivate myself to run. Last week I started just about everyday off with a 3 or 4 mile run and from that alone I could see a difference in my productivity for the day. I ruined it all by going home and drinking/eating a ton this weekend... but that's okay, I'll just run more this week :)
I signed up for a 3 race series that I am pretty excited about. I am doing a 5 miler in April, a 10K in June and then my half marathon in August. It's been my goal for a while to do a half, so I am excited that I am on track to run one.
Fourth topic: Random?
I think I have hit just about everything important. I'll be sure to update on whether or not I DO get to go and see Sterling this week. Even though it will be a lot of work, it will be SO worth it. I cannot wait to love on that man and to just be with him for a few days.
And now... it's time to stop procrastinating!
